•·.·´¯`·.·•Sick Punchlines Thread•·.·´¯`·.·•

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Props Slaps
 11 years ago '04        #41
uncfan888 5 heat pts
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$17,711 | Props total: 15 15
a pretty good song from luda with a bunch of punchlines...

Cry Babies


I got people scared as fu*k like when condoms break
Or how your heart deals with eatin' eighty pounds of steak
So put your belly on a plate and watch your weight
You frostin' like a flake and Ludacris feels grrreat!
Who want come face me, face come want who?
And women give me face until they're face turns blue
They can't breathe, d*ck to mouth recessatation
A tight squeeze witch stops the length to conversations
I Playstations, duck cops and lose agents
I'm Doctor Love, I close curtains and fu*k patients
When I kick and rip and flip an indespensable rhyme
My black a.ss is so hungry I'll take a bite out of crime
And it'll hurt if I swallow, but even more if I choke
Neighbors called the fire station off the blunt that I smoke
You see I crush cowards, funerals I'll send flowers
And I'm on the overpass flick pennies at rush hour

[Chorus]

[Verse Two: Ludacris]
You see I'm ambidextrous I slap a.ss with both hands
Delete your first steps, but I'll save the last dance
I just bought some new guns my mama said "it ain't worth it"
But I'm at the shooting range just 'cause practice makes perferct
Bullseye, I stunt growth and stop lives
You run with n*ggas that's more chicken then pot pies
Bok bok bok I'm shakin your tale feathers
I got big balls, I'm a SAC King like Chris Webber
Luda' will take you back to duck hunt and double dribble
When n*ggas sold quarters and dimes and smoked nickels
My cars got big TVs and satellites
I got a Wheel of Fortune 'cause I flipped O's like Vanna White
And the servey says? (Kill a mutha fu*ka now)
Could it be off with his head? (Or shoot a mutha fu*ka down)
Ground round, ground chuck your ground beef
Bullets gather round then I shoot rounds around teeth

[Chorus]

[Verse Three: Ludacris]
I kick n*ggas in they're a.ss reboot 'em like laptops
And they wouldn't even box if I gave 'em a flat top
You punks pucker and pout, bicker and babble
Now they all lost for words like I beat 'em in Scrabble
You see I'm from a small town called "Fresh out a cop's a.ss"
Where Mr. Head-Potatoes are skinned they get mashed
I smell puss from fifty yards
Y'all not playin with full decks as if I jacked out ya Jacks and left fifty cards
Catch me in Vegas spinnin' the green
I re-up with more chips than a vending machine
Then you can catch me in Rome, mackin' some broads and stickin' 'em
And you'll be at home picking your bougars and flicking 'em
A drug dealer's dream, so fresh and I'm so clean
I'm a grown a.ss man and you're sweeter than sixteen
So go and kick rocks peons you're just rookies
Headed down stairs to get you some milk and cookies
 01-31-2007, 05:27 PM         #42
Saltine_Escobar  OP
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"I Don't Brush My Teeth My Plaques Already Platinum" - Celph Titled

"My Mouth Kinda Like The Side Of Your Place, Cuz Right There Is Right Were You Find The Fire Escape" - DZK

"Cuz With College Comes Broads That Wanna Swallow d*ck So Why Give Up My Scholarship When I Can Get My Knowledge Quick" - K-Nice

"Hit It In Front Of The Mirror So When I Hit It From The Rear She Has Something To Look Forward To" - K-Nice
 01-31-2007, 05:35 PM         #43
Saltine_Escobar  OP
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purple gang gots alot.... cant think of any right now except...

"want drama, better hold it in, ill leave u dead in front of ya momma like soulja slim"
 01-31-2007, 05:42 PM         #44
MrW1gg1es  OP
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Nice punchlines, I will post some later on my lunch break...

Keep this thread alive...

Props to anyone that contributes...
 01-31-2007, 05:42 PM         #45
Saltine_Escobar  OP
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"I Put A Nine On Ya Back Like Jordan In Barcelona" - T-Flame [Purple Gang]
 01-31-2007, 05:46 PM         #46
Saltine_Escobar  OP
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t-flame vs young dre... flame the cat on the left... boy nice...

 01-31-2007, 05:50 PM         #47
Saltine_Escobar  OP
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"I leave twelve holes steaming in ya body like the bottom of an iron" - Famous [Purple Gang]
 01-31-2007, 06:37 PM         #48
I234P312  OP
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youm mad cuz i stylin on u.,,


jay kay...some1 had 2 say it



"A Microphone is my utencil/ feeling n*ggas with so much lead they can use they d*ck for a pencil"

-Big L

"Im so ahead of my time my parents havent met yet"

-Big L


"Why do fake n*ggas switch there stripes yesterday you was a blood but then you flipped tonight, you like that sh*t that k!lled superman cause you a crip tonight"

-Papoose

"I got more wins than a hurricane"

-Papoose


Im the illest sh*t that came out from china since the SARS disease

-Jin
 01-31-2007, 06:53 PM         #49
MrW1gg1es  OP
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"i gotta question for any body following you/what kinda niigga dress up in a leprachaun suit/wit a lollypop chain and some leprachaun boots/being lame is curse you could never undo/even worse yo repetation go forever haunt you/keep ryming about shiit that you wont do and pistols you dont shoot/yo heart pump surrop so niiggas could punk you" -T.I. (live lil flip diss at a concert flip was posed to be at)

"I' jerk off inside books and give life to words,
leaving concepts stuck together you probably never heard"
- Immortal Tech

"Lyrics are weak, like clock radio speakers"
- GZA

"Fill you with so much lead you can use your d*ck as a pencil"
- Big L

Let the god bless you like Achoo!
Get you like whats that on your chest clook! gotchu
- MF DOOM - Is He Ill?

It ain't where you from, it's wheres your gat
- Big Punisher - You ain't a k!ller


Kiss the pyramid experiment with high explosive
I slapbox with Jesus, lick shots at Joseph
- Ghostface k!llah - Daytona 500


To my comp I'm a ton I get amped like Watts in a riot
my compact disc is a commodity, so buy it
- Common - Communism

Yin for yang I walk on a line
Between
ghetto slang and stimulation of the mind

Life is a labyryth for dollars and cents
As I quest for cream,
through the steam so dense
Black Thought (The Roots) - Meiso

Givin' y'all nothing but the lick like two broads
Got more lyrics than the church got 'Ooh Lords'

Or even one with two blades on it
Hey you, don't touch the mic like it's AIDS on it
MF DOOM - Accordian


Last edited by MrW1gg1es; 01-31-2007 at 06:54 PM..
 01-31-2007, 06:54 PM         #50
MrW1gg1es  OP
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Lil' Wayne or Weezy F. Baby

"weezy f. baby tha mutha fukin carter/bi*ches on my stick but my name aint harry potter" -Weezy f. baby

"young weezy in this muthfu*ka hand cuff her/she aint nuttin but sum stairs i den ran up her" -Weezy f. baby

"rollin up steppin out of tha phantoms a.ss/ put ya lighta away ya talkin to a can of gas" -Weezy f. baby

"my daughter want another sister or brother/ and you lookin lyk a mother"-Weezy f. baby

"lookin for a laday/high and sedated/got her to tha crib i don know how a niigga made it/she gave me relations so now we related/ the morning comes tha picture faded" -Weezy f. baby

"we lyk to travel so she let us run a train"-Weezy f. baby

"bi*ches all on a niigga bread lyk mustard"-Weezy f. baby

"im five foot six/nice sized d*ck/long a.ss hair you could pull my shiit/i dont even care we could do it any where/bust one on tha elevator one on the stairs/she seperated her legs on tha arms of chair/s3x is in tha air/still lil wayne disregard tha lil/how tha boi grew up and got s3x appeal/ i heal that pus*y like vagiseal/feet and toes i aint really into that/just wanna put my hand on top yo head like a fitted cap/observe that no clothes sign when you in my crib"-Weezy f. baby

"we call that cocaine rice i got that kondoleeza" -Weezy f. baby

"im in traffic bobin and weevin/im in and out like pus*y and p*nis"-Weezy f. baby

"money money money get a dollar and a d*ck/weezy baby got that crack mutha fu*ka get a fix/got money at tha a.ss no homo but im rich/im about to trip to japan on sum brand new sh*t/bout to go get surgery and put some diamonds in my wrist/900 hundred to a grands/get u 38 grams/if u lookin for work im tha interstate man"-Weezy f. baby

"never filled out an apllication still got plenty work"-Weezy f. baby

"my mackin vicous/ask ya girl bout my d*ck she say thas delicous/ask ya girl did she spit she say thas nutritous/ask her did she get flipped she say thas tradition/if she say she didn't thas suspicous/u need to stop listenin to them nasty bi*ches"-Weezy f. baby

"we still got caskets in tha basement/burnas on tha counters and tats on tha faces"-Weezy f. baby

"miss katrina turned my city to a sea shore"-Weezy f. baby

"young money wee outta skoo but we still got chemistry"-Weezy f. baby


"im lookin at 24 bricks on tha counter/i make em dissappear in 24 hours"-Weezy f. baby

"they tellin me im tha shiit like a niigga dont piss" weezy f. baby

"call me lil russell crowe for my beautiful mind" weezy F. baby
 01-31-2007, 07:01 PM         #51
MrW1gg1es  OP
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Straws

" fu*k legs when I'm shootin' the mag-
I don't play ball for Cleveland, Straws ain't shootin' for +ca(l)v(e)s "

" Make you sit on ya Dreamcast- c*ck & aim
So when I pop, they can say u got on top of ya game "

" What you writing is foolish-
Blow ya guts on the microphone'll put some life in ya music "

" Call me T-Boz, I done slept with Mack 10's "

" Do you like Oreo's, split you apart, and take ya +creame+ "

" I'll send ya lungs on a date--
They BOTH'LL be +going out together+ "

" My money +Phill+Up Banks+ like Carlton's father "

" Do you like ironing boards--
Put the heat to ya clothes & press it "

" Break you apart for paper, like fortune cookies "

" Plus y'all workin' with small paper, like the Jet mag "

" Play the Bad Boy role, go head...
You'll lose BIG like Diddy did "

" Unless it's soda, don't put +Straws+ in nothing "

" Like a farmer, I'll put ya seeds in the ground "

" Pushed more rocks, than cliff hangers "

" Before Claudette , and them 2 Guys..
I had the +City High+ "

" Like the toothfairy--
I'll leave +Money+ under his pillow "

" I'll put ya spine in ya mouth--
Now y'all n*ggas can't +back-talk +

" My guns got hemroids- I can't sit 'em down "

" Ya money is like clay homeboy,- that's +play-dough+ "

" You n*ggas talkin' 'bout handling keys?
Y'all fu*kin' wit +Kid Rocks+, y'all like Pamela Lee "
 01-31-2007, 07:43 PM         #52
TuRbØ  OP
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are you from itsbx or something..you make the same exact fu*king threads as on bx..j/w
 01-31-2007, 08:10 PM         #53
MrW1gg1es  OP
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Yup I have been VIP on Jukebox forever...
 11 years ago '06        #54
Rique 60 heat pts60
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$40,506 | Props total: 17939 17939
Its simple, I keep lead like a pencil, Don't make me have to write a paragraph on your temple...
 11 years ago '05        #55
Wasted|M 26 heat pts26
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$12,305 | Props total: 69 69
Had your last $20, you love to get high,
My album or a bag of weed? Which one you gon' buy?

I brought a chair in the booth, while I'm spittin this rhyme,
cause I know if I stand up, I'ma loose my mind,

My path is un-walked, my craft is blood sport,
I could school your whole class with one thought,

f!ght for my homie, his challenge is un-fought,
Bang for equality, blast the gun off,

Now you acting like you passing your torch,
I guess you think I'm an a.ss or some sort,

Lyricism back with classics, I walked
from A to Z, then went backwards, I scorched,

Set fire to they a.sses, I fought,
Went to the south and sent the traffic up north,

n*ggas acting like my math is un-taught,
That's a portion not half, you dumb short


Papoose
 11 years ago '06        #56
Rique 60 heat pts60
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$40,506 | Props total: 17939 17939
 I234P312 said:
"Why do fake n*ggas switch there stripes yesterday you was a blood but then you flipped tonight, you like that sh*t that k!lled superman cause you a crip tonight"

-Papoose
What track is this from?
 11 years ago '06        #57
ProLogic 
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$4,763 | Props total: 9 9
Juelz Santana
"I'm a betta child....You's a pedafile"

Yung Joc
You fu*k wit mine I pause ya life line//
I'm a Graffiti artist paintin chalk outlines//
And the worst part is I'm not a coward//
Visit ya wake and give ya momma dead flowers//

Duke(from Boyz N Da Hood) Song:Felonies
Alot of n*ggas they be claimin the spot//
But we the only ones still representin like mascots//

Duke
Jeezy just beeped in on the celly
Got the pre-teen numbers I like
Like R.Kelly

^That n*gga whole verse fiya
 11 years ago '06        #58
I hug the strip 8 heat pts
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$2,099 | Props total: 434 434
 Rique said:
What track is this from?
underground king mixtape
soulute the dream
 01-31-2007, 09:53 PM         #59
I234P312  OP
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 Rique said:
What track is this from?



"Salute The Dream"
 01-31-2007, 09:53 PM         #60
KJ Rulz  OP
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"I'll treat ya like milk, I'll do nothing but spoil ya" Lil Flip



sik wit it!!! haha
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