Favorite Dave Chappelle Quote

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Props Slaps
 9 years ago '06        #161
Badnewz100 
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"my name is leonard washington and i don't get butt nekkid for nobody you want dis roll n*gga you gon have to shoot me"

"clankity clank clank"-tron

"i wrote dis a long time ago"-tupac comedy scene
 9 years ago '08        #162
BRonin357 6 heat pts
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$5,998 | Props total: 1474 1474
The Pac song was classic! That's not your wife! I can see it now!

Damn my fav probably already said but fu*k it!
The Bum on the bus joke

"Ahhhh, that feels better, you....smash your t*tties together!
 09-11-2008, 06:38 PM         #163
Rhyme n Tekniq  OP
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Dave Chappelle describing his stay with the indians about to smoke some weed

" the little ones are 20 and the big ones are 50"

"Mr. President stop sucking the ambassadors d*ck, that is not how we handle business in the white house sir"

"No let him finish, there will finally be peace in Israel "


something about the way Chappelle said

"Whats all this chocolate on ya face............Muthafu*ka!!!!!!!!"
"its Doo Doo Baby"

Oldschool Dave chappelle

only real chappelle fans will know this one

white guy- "im pissed off"
Chappelle-" If i was that close to a horses weiner, Id be worried about gettin pissed on"

heard that sh*t when i was a kid and died laughing
 9 years ago '08        #164
Tecnique 27 heat pts27
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$11,410 | Props total: 156 156
 9 years ago '06        #165
Manny05 1 heat pts
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 irhabi007 said:
The "Turn My Headphones Up!" skit from the Chappelle Show.

Turn my headphones up, what?
I am serious n1gga I can't hear outta this ear.
Yeah, hold on n1gga I can't hear outta my left ear,
turn them sh1ts up.
This one n1gga it's my left.
You ready to see how we drop it in the streets?
I said drop the beat not drumroll.
Now let the beat build like that, Uh, uh...
What happened? Turn my head phones up...

"I'd stab a n1gga in the neck with a butter knife for Fisticuffs!"
 Badnewz100 said:
"my name is leonard washington and i don't get butt nekkid for nobody you want dis roll n*gga you gon have to shoot me"

"clankity clank clank"-tron

"i wrote dis a long time ago"-tupac comedy scene
 PutYouOnGame said:
the tupac skit is the G.O.A.T.
Listen close, as life turns it's pages,
Makaveli here kickin' rhymes for the ages.
Seen things in stages,
Wise words spoken by sages,
From SkyTel to Blackberry pagers.
Your crew don't phase us,
We'll make you bustas pay us,
Run up in your spot like C.J. from San Andreas.

(Chorus)
I wrote this song a long time ago,
A real long time ago. Feel me!
I wrote this song a long time ago,
Was the dopest song I ever wrote... in '94.

What can a n*gga do,
When half the people voted for George W.
Life's a bi*ch, cause George W., can't be true,
I wanna choke him, cause he's a snitch,
I'm talkin' bout George W. Smith, from city council,
He ran in '93 out in Oakland, you probabably didn't hear about him.

(Chorus)
I wrote this song a long time ago,
A real long time ago.
Way before Slim Shady was in demand,
Way before we dropped bologna on Afghanistan.
I wrote this song in '94.

{{missisng}} am I doin' this.

Look around the club,
See everyone in the place,
Showing Pac love,
Got a smile on my face.
The girl in the miniskirt, has bad taste,
Cause that shirt don't match,
There's a pudding stain on the back.
And what the **** is that! It might be doo doo!

And you in the back you ain't ****,
You want a Gin & Tonic but you didn't even tip.
And if you hit this table one more time,
Then the record might skip... might skip.
I told you, stop hittin' the table.

Tupac Shakur,
I wrote this rhyme in 1994.
I'm not alive!
Thug Life!
Dave Chappelle, that ain't your wife.
{{missisng}} ... Go Home!

(Chorus)
I wrote this song a long time ago,
A real long time ago.
Way before {{missisng}},
Way before Dave Chappelle had two kids.
Don't give him no coochie.

DJ: Tupac rest in peace.

Ok, I will.

oh my god. that tupac song was the sh*t when i heard it. sh*t had me rolling for days. especially that KKK skit. sh*t was mad funny too
 9 years ago '08        #166
OirAsiR 
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*him doin an impression of eminem's lose yourself* "spaghetti! spaghetti!"

hahahaa
 9 years ago '05        #167
dreas_24 25 heat pts25
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My favorite one was when he shot the jumpshot with the condom into the waste basket and said "Kobe"!!!

lmao

thas my sh*t lol
 9 years ago '04        #168
jeehtoven 51 heat pts51
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 Rico23 said:
Wow who bumped this? this was made way before i even knew anything about message boards......


Well anyway:



:applause:
hahaha...I bumped it. I watched Seasons 1 and 2 and I couldn't stop thinking how funny this was. I used to get blunted and watch this every week. They're having a marathon this weekend too.
 09-13-2008, 03:48 AM         #169
Young Candino  OP
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The n*gga bought some yellow cake...

Are you sure it was yellow? - reporter

Yes im sure biiiiiiiiiiiiitch.. i got head of the CIA to tell you...

Mos Def: We jsut cameback from Africa, and the motherufker bought some yellow cake...

Jed: CRAAAAAAAAADLE OF MOTHERFUKIN CIVILIZATION

PRAY TO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD YOU DONT DROP THAT sh*t

 9 years ago '06        #170
Southern_Boi 
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Have you ever had something happen that was so racist that you didnt even get mad?
You was just like "God damn! that was racist" It was so blatant you were just like "wow!"

Almost like it didnt even happen to you it was like a fu*kin movie. Like you was watchin Mississippi Burning "wow!"

That happen to me, I was in Mississippi. I was in Mississippi doin a show and I go to the restaurant to order some food and I say to the guy "I would like to have-" and before I even finish my order he says "THE CHICKEN!" I was like "what the fu*k?"

I could not believe it, I could not believe that sh*t. This man was absolutely right. I said how did he know he know that I was gone get some chicken?

I asked him I said "How you know that? Howd you know I was gone get some chicken?"

He looked at me like I was crazy "Come on buddy. Come ooon buddy! Now everybody knew as soon as you walked through the god damn door."

"You're gone get some chicken"

Had it on bootleg and this n*gga made me blow my high I was laughin too hard


Last edited by Southern_Boi; 09-15-2008 at 08:05 AM..
 09-13-2008, 07:32 AM         #171
rockroyal24  OP
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White wife - Want me to light your cigarette for you too.

Leonard Washington - Better check your tone girl. Put your inside voice on for I put your a.ss outside.

Trading Spouses.
 9 years ago '04        #172
DaKidB.A.N.K.$ 5 heat pts
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"my friend jasper told me one of them coons came up to pick his sister up for a date, he said look her zzzzzz that there is my sister, anyone gonna have s3x with my sister its gonna be me" - clayton bigsby lol

"yall gotta get brea$t milk from a cambodian immigrant..i only drink the finest....brea$t milks"
 9 years ago '04        #173
DoctorJ|m 35 heat pts35
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the whole wayne brady skit
"is wayne brady gonna have to choke a b*tch"


Last edited by DoctorJ; 09-13-2008 at 08:04 PM..
 9 years ago '07        #174
killahkazi 15 heat pts15
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this is remix edition, of a song about pissin
 9 years ago '04        #175
hansolo79 
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[email changed - confirm acct by email]
News Reporter: What about people who say you're only interested in the Middle East for oil?
President Black Bush: What? Huh? Oil? Who said somethin' bout oil, bi*ch. You cookin?




Last edited by hansolo79; 09-13-2008 at 08:40 PM..
 9 years ago '07        #176
DiplomatMagic 16 heat pts16
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[IMG]http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i186/stormshadow247/fu*kYoCouchn*gga.gif[/IMG]
 09-18-2008, 09:48 PM         #177
juelz318  OP
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 DoctorJ said:
the whole wayne brady skit
"is wayne brady gonna have to choke a b*tch"
I have to co-sign. The Wayne Brady skit was the funniest cause it was unexpected. My favorite line from the skit is:

"This is not an option n*gga. If you do not smoke this then we have a problem." Wayne Brady's face is priceless.
 09-18-2008, 11:15 PM         #178
HR_Paperstacks  OP
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"I'm bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeding!"- Tron from Mad Real World
 9 years ago '05        #179
Bx_Bomberz 188 heat pts188
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 juelz318 said:
I have to co-sign. The Wayne Brady skit was the funniest cause it was unexpected. My favorite line from the skit is:

"This is not an option n*gga. If you do not smoke this then we have a problem." Wayne Brady's face is priceless.


one of my favorites n i dont think its been posted is

"game blouses"
 9 years ago '07        #180
Cartel-Clipz 28 heat pts28
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 bc/o06 said:
so you just gone do yo taxes right i front of me playboy
that's whats hot in the streets ness?

and of course...

"turn my headphones up!.........I'm serious n*gga turn them sh*ts up!"

"alright make that beat drop!..............n*gga I said drop not drumroll"


Last edited by Cartel-Clipz; 09-19-2008 at 08:44 AM..
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