Favorite Dave Chappelle Quote

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 10 years ago '04        #181
BklynKid718 
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$2,193 | Props total: 19 19
wife: "Dave, we need to talk"
.........
Dave:
(sits down)

"fu*k!!!!!"
 09-19-2008, 06:18 PM         #182
almcaffee  OP
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WHAT THE fu*k IS JUICE????

I WANT THE PURPLE STUFF!!!

two of the best ever, but these are from his stand up not the chapelle show...
 09-19-2008, 07:11 PM         #183
lightysilo18  OP
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the nelson mandela boot camp " if i wanted to be mean i would call this boy fat and push his bosoms together and make love to them."
 10 years ago '07        #184
Adam Is BeTTeR 2 heat pts
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$13,485 | Props total: 3352 3352
Man that toilet was disgustin...wasn't fit for christian butt cheeks...so I had two choices...I could either go doo doo in my trousers, which I couldn't, that was the only good pair I had at the time, or...I could use a white restroom...it was risky...but so was mudd butt!

and

"All this time I been thinkin I liked fried chicken cuz it was delicious... Turns out i'm genetically predisposed to liking chicken"


Last edited by Adam Is BeTTeR; 09-19-2008 at 07:44 PM..
 10 years ago '05        #185
YoungerHov 
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All good ones, but I don't see two if my favorites:

"Bucknasty, what you said about my coat deeply offends me. It was made by your mother's pubic hair." - Classic

And at the end of the skit when they put up the Rosie O Donnell picture and he says: "She looks like she wear underwear with d*ck Hooooooles" - the whole cast breaks character... Cooooooold Blooooooooded


Last edited by YoungerHov; 09-19-2008 at 08:43 PM..
 10 years ago '05        #186
YoungerHov 
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$679 | Props total: 28 28
 Adam Is BeTTeR said:
Man that toilet was disgustin...wasn't fit for christian butt cheeks...so I had two choices...I could either go doo doo in my trousers, which I couldn't, that was the only good pair I had at the time, or...I could use a white restroom...it was risky...but so was mudd butt!

and

"All this time I been thinkin I liked fried chicken cuz it was delicious... Turns out i'm genetically predisposed to liking chicken"
Second quote is from k!lling Them Softly... but a classic nonetheless.
 10 years ago '04        #187
apfam77 
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some mark a.ss trick just stepped on my sneakers and poured mortons salt all over me.
 9 years ago '07        #188
CadillacVyse 1018 heat pts1018
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$28,742 | Props total: 21022 21022
oil..you cookin b***h?
 9 years ago '05        #189
I_REP_VA 10 heat pts10
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$8,081 | Props total: 2232 2232
aw man it's gotta be in makin da band where he's p.diddy

he's like.. "taxes ness? is that what they doin in the hood?"

hahahhahaha
 9 years ago '05        #190
I_REP_VA 10 heat pts10
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$8,081 | Props total: 2232 2232
"Dave.. I'm gonna race em"
 05-15-2009, 01:45 PM         #191
Dastrola  OP
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'I rip and I Rhyme, Rhyme and I rip, Dis iz da way Dylan Spits.'

That whole making the band skit is hilarious!
 9 years ago '08        #192
Ron O'Neal 5 heat pts
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now as i sip my soda that im sure somebody spit in. from the players haters ball

one of the paul mooney skits when mooney says to the guy "n*gga what is up with your teeth" or something like that
 9 years ago '08        #193
svvt14 2 heat pts
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" oh s**t its Wayne Brady son
Riverside Mutha f**ka"

lmao
 05-15-2009, 04:29 PM         #194
TheCityOnMyMind  OP
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What did the 5 fingers say to the face?.......Slap
 9 years ago '07        #195
Pistol Peter 33 heat pts33
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$26,679 | Props total: 21 21
"hey..im just a n*gga that like t*tties"
 9 years ago '04        #196
lilsnatch770|M 102 heat pts102
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First they had The Mexican with Brad Pitt and now we have The Last Samurai with Tom Cruise? Maybe they'll produce my film: The Last n*gga on Earth starring Tom Hanks


hahahahahaah
 05-15-2009, 06:31 PM         #197
J. Lewis  OP
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Put some treble in it, put some treble in it...that's my word
 9 years ago '07        #198
Jeet Kune Do 12 heat pts12
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 lilsnatch770 said:
First they had The Mexican with Brad Pitt and now we have The Last Samurai with Tom Cruise? Maybe they'll produce my film: The Last n*gga on Earth starring Tom Hanks


hahahahahaah
I was rollin when I seen him say that
 9 years ago '06        #199
Knockout5 7 heat pts
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The player hater ball when he roast Rosie O'Donell sayin "It looks like she wears panties with d**k holes in them"
 9 years ago '07        #200
Pistol Peter 33 heat pts33
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 lilsnatch770 said:
First they had The Mexican with Brad Pitt and now we have The Last Samurai with Tom Cruise? Maybe they'll produce my film: The Last n*gga on Earth starring Tom Hanks


hahahahahaah
lmao i was driving to work the other day and i thought about that one and i busted out laughing
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