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Snake Eyes was pure dumpster juice like we all said it would be



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Top 10 most slapped recently  2 months ago '20        #1
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BlacksAndLatins  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x1
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Props total: 15999 15 K  Slaps total: 10064 10 K
Snake Eyes was pure dumpster juice like we all said it would be
 

 
No Timber image

No Cobra Commander image

Isn't disfigured or even mute image

Is neither a gaijin nor a war veteran image

Isn't even an honorable character really either image

And the action scenes were terribad. Everything was trash. TRASH.

wiki synopsis :
A young boy is orphaned when his father is murdered. Years later, the boy has grown into a talented and deadly martial arts f*ghter, driven by a desire to avenge his father. To conceal his true identity, he calls himself "Snake Eyes", a name inspired by watching his father's murderer force him to roll a pair of dice to determine his fate; his father was k*lled when he rolled double ones.

While working at a fish factory, Snake Eyes is approached by a wealthy yakuza boss, Kenta, who offers to find his father's k*ller if Snake Eyes works for him. When Snake Eyes is asked to prove his loyalty by shooting a man who betrayed Kenta's trust, Snake Eyes deliberately misses the shot and helps the traitor escape. The traitor is revealed to be Kenta’s cousin, Tommy. Tommy and Kenta were both in line to lead Clan Arashikage, an ancient society devoted to preserving order and f*ghting evil. Kenta sought to k*ll his brother, but failed, and was banished.

Grateful to Snake Eyes for helping him escape, Tommy takes Snake Eyes to his clan and asks that he be initiated as a member. The current clan leader, Tommy’s grandmother Sen, agrees to let Snake Eyes undergo three trials to determine whether he is worthy of membership. The clan's head of security, Akiko, doesn’t trust Snake Eyes, but he wins her trust by revealing his sincerity to join the clan and finally avenge himself on his father's k*ller. The two gradually start to form a romantic attachment. Unbeknownst to anyone, Snake Eyes plans to betray his new allies. Tommy’s attempted murder and escape is shown to have been staged by Kenta in order to get Snake Eyes close enough to steal the clan's most sacred treasure, the "Jewel of the Sun".

Snake Eyes finds himself increasingly torn between his guilt over betraying Tommy and his clan, and his overwhelming desire for revenge. He passes the first two trials with his exceptional talents, and learns that the third and final trial requires his spirit to be tested by sacred anacondas, who know whether or not he is truly pure of heart. Due to Snake Eyes’ subterfuge, the snakes expose him as untrustworthy. Confronted by the clan, Snake Eyes admits that he has been not been honest, but manages to hide the true reason he betrayed the clan. As a consequence, he is expelled.

Snake Eyes returns in secret and steals the jewel using his knowledge of the clan's temple, delivering it to Kenta. Kenta explains that he is stealing the jewel on behalf of a terrorist organization known as Cobra. Cobra, through their liaison, the Baroness, has been arming Kenta with weapons so that he can seize control of Clan Arashikage. Snake Eyes receives his reward for stealing the jewel: his father’s k*ller, who turns out to be a Cobra agent. Having realized what his bloodlust has cost him, Snake Eyes spares the man and instead goes back to Clan Arashikage to warn them of Kenta's attack.

Tommy puts aside his anger and lets Snake Eyes a*sist him and the clan's warriors, including a red-haired woman with a crossbow, in f*ghting off Kenta's men. After Kenta admits that he has no intention of handing over the jewel, the Baroness abandons him and defects to the clan's side. With his men defeated, Kenta loses the jewel to Tommy, who in his fury tries to use its power to murder his brother. Kenta manages to escape, but Snake Eyes traps him in the anaconda pit, where the snakes devour Kenta upon sensing his evil spirit. They judge Snake Eyes to be pure of heart for forgoing his revenge and thus he becomes worthy to join the clan.

After the f*ght, Sen tells Tommy that he is no longer fit to lead the clan as he broke their vow to never use the jewel. Enraged at being denied his birthright, Tommy forsakes the clan and his own family. Snake Eyes meets with the red-haired woman, Scarlett, who explains that his father was a G.I. Joe agent, part of an international peacekeeping organization of which she is also a member. Having completed her service to Clan Arashikage, she offers to bring Snake Eyes with her so he can see whether he would be interested in becoming a Joe. The Baroness locates Tommy, who now calls himself Storm Shadow, and recruits him into Cobra.
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35 comments
 

Top 10 most propped recently  2 months ago '20        #2
5ive04our  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x139
Props total: 77848 77 K  Slaps total: 16800 16 K


They tried to rush this shxt and put it out before ShangChi
+14   

 2 months ago '16        #3
mobchip 
Props total: 10400 10 K  Slaps total: 1337 1 K
I was going to watch it @10:15 pm and you guys have convinced me not to see it. I'll probably go grab some taco bell and call it a night watching Korean chicks on Twitch.
+6   

 2 months ago '05        #4
Daddy Black 
Props total: 14430 14 K  Slaps total: 1272 1 K
Thank you! I woulda been pissed if I wasted precious theatre time on this.
+6   

 2 months ago '17        #5
Naga Sadow  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x20
Props total: 180976 180 K  Slaps total: 13061 13 K
Once I heard the dude playing Snake Eyes talking I knew it was gonna be straight swamp cheeks.
+9   

 2 months ago '17        #6
Traptank 
Props total: 90 90  Slaps total: 8 8
What you think venom will be ?
+1   

 2 months ago '07        #7
-ThE~DoN~LoN- 
Props total: 5443 5 K  Slaps total: 1390 1 K
Grace Randolph said it was to Asians what Black Panther is to black people.
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 2 months ago '17        #8
JacobWatch  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x1
Props total: 46263 46 K  Slaps total: 3157 3 K
 -ThE~DoN~LoN- said
Grace Randolph said it was to Asians what Black Panther is to black people.
Nah.

Black panther was no where near these levels of trash.
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 2 months ago '05        #9
Stuart Scott  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x20
Props total: 68122 68 K  Slaps total: 10561 10 K
they fu*ked up by making this PG13

n*ggas got andrew koji and iko uwais and fu*ked it up
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Top 10 most slapped recently  2 months ago '20        #10
BlacksAndLatins  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x1 OP
Props total: 15999 15 K  Slaps total: 10064 10 K
To clear up a couple things...

1) Snake Eyes is supposed to look like THIS




And yes, him being white does matter.

For context... A gaijin traveling to Japan and becoming an infinitely badass ninja is like a talented Black guitarist living in the deep south during Jim Crow managing to win over a bunch of hardcore racists and become the highest selling country artist of all time or a white dude being the leader of Black prison gang. You have to be one seriously hardcore motherfu*ker to pull that off.

Erasing that part of the character and reducing him to mere f*ghtING ORPHAN NINJA SWORD DUDE GO CHOP CHOP basically makes him yet another generic, bland, dime a dozen, "action movie guy" when he's supposed to be so much more.

2) What *really* happened is Snake Eyes is a Viet Nam war veteran who survives an explosion that leaves him disfigured and ruins his vocal chords rendering him mute. Upon arriving home, as he was waiting for his family to pick him up at the airport, Snake Eyes's family tragically died in a horrific car wreck with the driver of the other car being none other than Cobra Commander's brother.

Thomas Arashikage (Storm Shadow), Snake Eyes's old war buddy, reaches out and invites him to come to Japan and learn the ways of the ninja. Snake Eyes accepts.

Cobra Commander, however, harbored an extreme grudge against Snake Eyes and wanted revenge. So Cobra Commander reaches out to Firefly to a*sassinate Snake Eyes. Firefly initially infiltrates the clan but eventually subcontracts the hit to master impersonator Zartan. Long story short, Zartan (who, like Storm Shadow is also highly skilled with the bow and arrow) impersonates Storm Shadow and attempts to k*ll Snake Eyes but winds up k*lling Storm Shadow's uncle, Hard Master, instead. Storm Shadow is framed for the murder because witnesses saw "Storm Shadow" (really Zartan in disguise) fleeing the scene and because the murder weapon was a particular arrow that Storm Shadow was well known for using.

Storm Shadow vows revenge and attempts to go undercover into Cobra as Cobra Commander's personal bodyguard but unfortunately gets repeatedly brainwashed and basically turned into Cobra Commander's own personal Winter Soldier instead.

3) This whole "beef" between Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow is a giant misconception. It's often believed that Storm Shadow "resented" Snake Eyes because he supposedly "envied" how the Arashikage clan supposedly "favored" Snake Eyes over him but that never really happened. Storm Shadow pretty much only really ever had to f*ght Snake Eyes because he was brainwashed into doing so. It's like saying Bucky was "jealous" of Steve Rogers or something and that's why they had several f*ghts against each other when really Hydra had control over Bucky's mind and there was never any actual animosity.


Last edited by BlacksAndLatins; 07-25-2021 at 09:18 AM..
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 2 months ago '19        #11
NoFuxGvn 
Props total: 2790 2 K  Slaps total: 133 133
At home watching it now.

Not terrible.
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 2 months ago '11        #12
CALViiiN  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x25
Props total: 68630 68 K  Slaps total: 8339 8 K
ALMOST WENT TO WATCH JUST CAUSE THERE AINT sh*t TO WATCH.



But next week. THE GREEN KNIGHT
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 2 months ago '05        #13
Muggz  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x1
Props total: 17666 17 K  Slaps total: 5049 5 K
this sh*t comin togetha like sweaty a*s cheeks n*gga

Top 10 most slapped recently  2 months ago '21        #14
outstanding  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x27
Props total: 16176 16 K  Slaps total: 14779 14 K
 mobchip said
I was going to watch it @10:15 pm and you guys have convinced me not to see it. I'll probably go grab some taco bell and call it a night watching Korean chicks on Twitch.
damn your life is trash wtf
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 2 months ago '16        #15
3LIT3 
Props total: 2682 2 K  Slaps total: 379 379
It wasn’t that bad it’s just the story was non-cannon! Snake Eyes is my favorite character ever especially as a kid, so I just enjoyed seeing him again, hopefully they continue the story or make more origin stories
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 2 months ago '17        #16
CJ Schwarz  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x4
Props total: 82392 82 K  Slaps total: 4682 4 K
It wasn't trash. It's just a regular popcorn flick.

 2 months ago '20        #17
TBlake 
Props total: 322 322  Slaps total: 44 44
 -ThE~DoN~LoN- said
Grace Randolph said it was to Asians what Black Panther is to black people.
Grace Randolph...if you listening to that trash a*s bi*ch idk bruh
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 2 months ago '16        #18
Frankie Needles  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x6
Props total: 25257 25 K  Slaps total: 7299 7 K
It was pure a*s....it would have been a decent ninja summer popcorn movie if they'd had called it something else, but it was them trying to make it a Snake Eyes origin story.

It's the equivalent of making T'Challa a mexican dude or making Wolverine 6 feet tall (my bad they actually did that)....

Like i said if it was called ninja revenge or something, it's a cool little moviem but that wasn't Snake Eyes not from G.I. Joe, fu*king sick of studios giving these classic IPs to directors and writers who think they're smarter than the people that made these properties profitable enough for them to try and make a movie of it in the first place
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 2 months ago '20        #19
Young Destro55 
Props total: 2191 2 K  Slaps total: 186 186
Had no intention of watching it after the 1st trailer. Looked like bulk day trash from the start
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 2 months ago '07        #20
-ThE~DoN~LoN- 
Props total: 5443 5 K  Slaps total: 1390 1 K
 TBlake said
Grace Randolph...if you listening to that trash a*s bi*ch idk bruh
Lol @ trash a*s bi*ch.. I think she's biased but not trash. She gave a good Army of the Dead review when that movie was super trash. And it was because shes cool with Zack Snyder. I wonder what she has in connection with Snake Eyes that made her give a greatly rated review on it.

 2 months ago '21        #21
luckky  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x2
Props total: 3094 3 K  Slaps total: 479 479

 2 months ago '04        #22
zhiggeman 
Props total: 10252 10 K  Slaps total: 1852 1 K
It was ok. I'd rather a zartan and dreadnock movie.
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 2 months ago '15        #23
RickJamez 
Props total: 9798 9 K  Slaps total: 1861 1 K

+3   

 2 months ago '11        #24
HipHop Is Life  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x4
Props total: 17994 17 K  Slaps total: 1291 1 K
 CALViiiN said
ALMOST WENT TO WATCH JUST CAUSE THERE AINT sh*t TO WATCH.



But next week. THE GREEN KNIGHT


Hell yeah
+2   

 2 months ago '05        #25
Stuart Scott  topics gone triple plat - Number 1 spot x20
Props total: 68122 68 K  Slaps total: 10561 10 K
 NoFuxGvn said
At home watching it now.

Not terrible.
HD quality? link?
+1   



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