Either you're too busy staining your sheets with sweat and other bodily fluids to read this right now, or your secret suspicions that everyone else in town is constantly getting laid are about to be confirmed. According to a Trojan Condoms survey, Miami is America's s3x capital. We rate first not only in s3xual satisfaction but also in the number of times we get busy each year.
Of course, this is a marketing-driven survey, and only Trojan's top ten markets were polled, but the results are interesting.
Seventy-three percent of Miamians say they're s3xually satisfied, and on average we have s3x 177 times a year. That means we're having s3x just about every other day. Granted, if we're all shagging that much, it follows that we're all pretty damn satisfied about it.
But seriously, s3x every other day? Either all of my single friends are lying about not having been laid since Lindsay Lohan was a functional member of society, or Miami couples hump three times a day to bring that average way up.
Miamians also rank second for number of lifetime s3xual partners, with 24 apiece, only one behind New Yorkers and Atlantans, who boast 25 bedroom buddies. Miamians also think about s3x ten times a day, behind only Los Angelinos, who have dirty thoughts 13 times daily. Sixty-eight percent of Miamians also say they're s3xually adventuresome, behind only Atlanta, with 71 percent.