Kris Humphries Finally Gets A Contract Offer

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Props Slaps
 12-16-2011, 05:46 PM         #1
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Cheeze 
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$n/a | Props total:  
Kris Humphries Finally Gets A Contract Offer
 

 


NBA center Kris Humphries has had a rough go of it of late. Not only did he become something of a laughingstock when he inexplicably married Krazy ol' Kim Kardashian, but his good name was even further sullied when the two divorced only 72 days later.

Now he's in the midst of a hilarious and wholly depressing battle full of mudslinging, ugly accusations, and manufactured reality TV drama.

Also, he doesn't have an NBA contract.

But the Syracuse Crunch of the American Hockey League, minor-league affiliate of the NHL's Anaheim Ducks, suspects that all Humphries needs in order to resurrect his career and restore his good name is escape from the hellish Kardashian limelight and get back into game shape.
And how better to do that than by joining the Crunch in New York? The AHL club has offered Humphries a spot on the team. From SyracuseCrunch.com:

"We would welcome Kris Humphries to Syracuse, where unlike Hollywood there are no paparazzi within hundreds of miles and he could reclaim his privacy and self-esteem," said Syracuse Crunch General Manager Vance Lederman. "Being from Minnesota, Humphries will surely enjoy the hockey and feel right at home in the cold, gray, dismal weather we experience this time of year in Central New York."


They're really banking on the Minnesota connection. Maggie Walters, the team's director of communications and marketing, to Puck Daddy on Thursday: "We're sure he's a hockey fan. You have to be or they'd kick you out."

The Crunch have put in calls to Humphries' people and even tweeted the release to him. They're pursuing him hard. Now they're just waiting to hear back.

He should accept. This is a mutually beneficial arrangement. At 6-9 and 235 pounds, Humphries could provide the Crunch a serious net presence. And in return, he gets a quiet place to work out with fitness professionals.

The Crunch said it will allow Humphries use of their state of the art training facility and provide a certified personal trainer who will be available to the basketball star as he attempts to earn a spot with a NBA team.

And in the meantime, Walters said the Crunch would give him some hockey lessons and put him to work in the front office answering phones and going out on sales calls.

No word on whether the NHL's Ducks are willing to make it a two-way contract.

In honor of the offer and in homage to the ill-fated, 72-day Kardashian-Humphries marriage, fans can purchase a six-pack of tickets to either the club's Dec. 16 or Dec. 17 game for only $72.

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30 comments for "Kris Humphries Finally Gets A Contract Offer"

 6 years ago '05        #2
iggyemu 
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$24,374 | Props total: 3272 3272
6-10 guys that get you 10 boards a game are almost as valuable as outside shooting. He'll get on a team soon enough.
 6 years ago '04        #3
MainEv3nt|M 21 heat pts21
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$21,294 | Props total: 28 28
i honestly hopes he comes back to dallas.
 6 years ago '06        #4
Rique 55 heat pts55
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$38,367 | Props total: 13812 13812
nets gonna resign him to a 1 year deal hes worth whatever he gets hes a 10-10 guy. He snatches every rebound in site. His problem is sometimes he thinks hes a superstar n takes shots he shouldnt
 6 years ago '06        #5
marcusaka50 53 heat pts53
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$28,114 | Props total: 6218 6218
he gonna get a deal just because he is a productive player.
 6 years ago '11        #6
omarnova 8 heat pts
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 Rique said:
nets gonna resign him to a 1 year deal hes worth whatever he gets hes a 10-10 guy. He snatches every rebound in site. His problem is sometimes he thinks hes a superstar n takes shots he shouldnt
^^^ this. he was a baby blake last season
 6 years ago '06        #7
down2earth 18 heat pts18
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$3,391 | Props total: 0 0
Rockets better throw a contract his way. No way we do anything decent this year with frail a.ss Jordan Hill at center.
 6 years ago '05        #8
BronxBombers 195 heat pts195
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$37,653 | Props total: 2290 2290
 down2earth said:
Rockets better throw a contract his way. No way we do anything decent this year with frail a.ss Jordan Hill at center.
Knicks waste a pick on that fucck

........either way he's Houston's problem now
 6 years ago '06        #9
Yung Dilla 1453 heat pts1453
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$53,096 | Props total: 18322 18322
he's gonna be a beast this year if he triggers all that anger/frustration he has built up!!
 12-16-2011, 11:09 PM         #10
OOps  OP
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This bum got divorced and cant find a team to ball on.......should have been working on his moves instead of trying to make it work with a reality star.
 6 years ago '05        #11
StateProperty88 33 heat pts33
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$38,488 | Props total: 5266 5266
he'll get a deal... he's a decent player
 6 years ago '10        #12
ghettofire 3 heat pts
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$27,157 | Props total: 141 141






come on to utah bro, i've never been there but i'm sure there's no armenian soul stealers there, plus we could use more power forwards
 6 years ago '10        #13
Dextromethorphan 217 heat pts217
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he'll be back in brick city throwing up bricks.
 6 years ago '06        #14
RAZAH CUTS 5655 heat pts5655
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 OOps said:
This bum got divorced and cant find a team to ball on.......should have been working on his moves instead of trying to make it work with a reality star.
yeah that's what he should of done... "worked on his moves"...

you sound like a fu*king idiot...

he's an average utility big man...was before the Kardashian bullsh*t, is now and prolly always will be....he'd be struggling to get work no matter what relationship he was in...


Last edited by RAZAH CUTS; 12-16-2011 at 11:56 PM..
 6 years ago '05        #15
AirForce318 
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$12,005 | Props total: 274 274
I can see the Nets bringing him back... OR Otis Smith better get on the phone and get him in a Magic jersey... Houston would be a legit spot for him too but he'd have to play Center for them...
 6 years ago '08        #16
AC_89 173 heat pts173
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$36,930 | Props total: 9801 9801
It do seem like he got blackballed a little hes a big with some talent he shouldve been got signed
 6 years ago '10        #17
Marcus Aurelius 49 heat pts49
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$7,870 | Props total: 3924 3924
 all3rd said:
Depht and big men for Rockets seem low wouldn't be shocked he may be looked at there?
 down2earth said:
Rockets better throw a contract his way. No way we do anything decent this year with frail a.ss Jordan Hill at center.
 feroze said:
Knicks waste a pick on that fucck

........either way he's Houston's problem now
Why waste money and minutes on Humphries when he doesn't make us a contender? Dude is a solid player but he's not a center, he's a PF of which we have plenty including four first round picks from the last three years (Patterson, Morris, Motiejunas, and Hill) who are all younger and have higher ceilings.

The team is much better off maintaining cap space and allowing McHale and these players time to develop than signing another role player at our deepest position.
 6 years ago '05        #18
zogby 42 heat pts42
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$2,131 | Props total: 26 26
put him on the same team as odom ...
 6 years ago '04        #19
Franchise08 69 heat pts69
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 down2earth said:
Rockets better throw a contract his way. No way we do anything decent this year with frail a.ss Jordan Hill at center.
They're in serious talks with Dalembert...thought you knew that being a "fan"....hmmm....
 6 years ago '04        #20
D1nOnlyMrM@ 42 heat pts42
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$12,240 | Props total: 1155 1155
go to the lakers. then him, kobe, n paul can play together and bi*ch bout their wives/exwives
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