8 Of The Lamest Superhero Movies Ever Made

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 7 years ago '09        #1
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Brainwave 5389 heat pts5389
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8 Of The Lamest Superhero Movies Ever Made
 

 
8) X-men: The Last Stand (2006)


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This third movie in the X-Men saga attempts to keep the momentum of the great second flick moving, and fails spectacularly, especially in the climactic scene in which Wolverine attacks Magneto, the master of magnetism, the man who can control all metal with his mind in his stronghold- in the forest. Are you serious?

7) Barb Wire (1996)


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To say that Barb Wire was based on a comic book is something of a tough sell, since while technically, it was a comic book, it was never really widely read or popular. And when you bring in a dumb blonde like Pamela Anderson to prance around, act s3xy, and shoot guns, that's all fun from a campy perspective, I guess, but ask yourself this question: Was it hard to get funding for a movie starring Pamela Anderson taking her top off and shooting guns?

6) The Punisher (s) (1989, 2004, 2008)


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There are three different Punisher movies out, and they are all dumb. Why? Because the Punisher himself, as popular as the comic book was in it's heyday, was nothing but a cheap rip-off of the popular vigilante films of the late 1970s and 80s. The Punisher vows a war on crime after his family is k!lled by thugs, so he runs around shooting bad guys. I wonder why we can't make a half-decent movie about that?

5) Wolverine: Origins (2009)


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Wolverine is an awesome character. There are no two ways about it. Having giant knives that spring out of your knuckles along with a mutant healing factor and a bad attitude is a recipe for fun, and this movie manages to suck all of it out. Featuring a convoluted back-story, and way too many characters, this film includes one awesome scene where Wolverine takes down a helicopter. That's the only good part of the whole film.

4) Fantastic Four (2005)


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With the success of other Marvel Comics films, it seemed inevitable that the FF would have their time in the Hollywood spotlight. Too bad the movie made no sense. One thing that seemed to be a positive was the casting of the incredibly s3xy Jessica Alba as the Invisible Girl.Jessica Alba. Invisible. Great idea.

3) Catwoman (2004)


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Now look here. I'm not made of stone over here. I am aware that Halle Berry is a s3xy woman. And I am also aware that a s3xy woman in a s3xy catsuit is s3xy to look at. But I have a sneaky suspicion that those were the only two factors that filmmakers considered before making this picture. When it comes to Batman villains, Catwoman is decidedly third string. Also, Batman isn't even in this movie. That means that this film is playing to audience members who, while watching Batman f!ght the Joker in a much better movie, thought to themselves "I wonder what Catwoman is up to?" No one was thinking that.

2) Steel (1997)


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Any amount of embarrassment you had for Stallone in Judge Dredd is multiplied by a thousand when you see Shaquille O' Neal in Steel. I'd tell you that it's sort of like Iron Man, and sort of like Robocop, but it's mostly unwatchable. Even in a funny way. Even the comic book character blew.

1) Ghost Rider (2007)


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Ghost Rider stumbled out of the gate largely because we're talking about a character that only rabid comic book fans have any affection for. I mean, if you don't already know who Ghost Rider is from the comics, it's a tough sell to explain to someone that it's "kind of like the Incredible Hulk, if the hulk was a mystical skeleton, covered in supernatural flames, who for some reason really likes motorcycles." In addition, they cast Nicholas Cage, who had just completed the now epic "so bad it's good" remake of the The Wicker Man, and was just beginning the phase of his artistic career known as his "bats$#% crazy" period.



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 Dumb as a Blog: 15 Dumbest Superhero Movies Photo Gallery - Fantastic Four (2005) - on truTV.com

99 comments for "8 Of The Lamest Superhero Movies Ever Made"

 7 years ago '05        #2
GROUCHCARTEL 97 heat pts97
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How is daredevil not on this list.......and It always pissed me off they f*cked up The punisher time and time again...
 7 years ago '06        #3
droid3000 995 heat pts995
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No elecktra or dare devil?
 7 years ago '06        #4
Pyro911 4 heat pts
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Elektra and Daredevil def need to be on there

no clue why The Punisher 2004 is on there. i liked that one
 7 years ago '07        #5
TH35 103 heat pts103
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 Pyro911 said:
Elektra and Daredevil def need to be on there

no clue why The Punisher 2004 is on there. i liked that one
I kind of did too. I think Elektra should take its place.
 05-12-2011, 01:01 AM         #6
usarmyboy83 
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The Punisher in 2004 was good.
 7 years ago '04        #7
PurpleHaze217 2 heat pts
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and Steel should be on its own list
 7 years ago '04        #8
T_Buck 9 heat pts
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The director's cut of Daredevil is dope as fu*k. People talking sh*t about the movie need to watch the DC. Adds about 30 minutes of new footage and focuses much less on romance. Also adds a subplot not in the theatrical. I believe it's also slightly more violent and has an R rating compared to the PG-13 theatrical cut.
 7 years ago '08        #9
AyeDre 13 heat pts13
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sh*t list
 7 years ago '05        #10
Danger Zone 58 heat pts58
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Wouldnt agree wid 4,5,6

The 04 punisher went hard as fu*kfu*k
 7 years ago '05        #11
kriskross00 103 heat pts103
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I still have Steel on vhs
 7 years ago '07        #12
TH35 103 heat pts103
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 T_Buck said:
The director's cut of Daredevil is dope as fu*k. People talking sh*t about the movie need to watch the DC. Adds about 30 minutes of new footage and focuses much less on romance. Also adds a subplot not in the theatrical. I believe it's also slightly more violent and has an R rating compared to the PG-13 theatrical cut.
I agree. The DC was better.
 7 years ago '06        #13
tdub-zr0 139 heat pts139
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 Pyro911 said:
Elektra and Daredevil def need to be on there

no clue why The Punisher 2004 is on there. i liked that one
Daredevil and Elektra are both on the original source list. The TS only posted 8 out of the 15.
 05-12-2011, 03:06 AM         #14
DOOMage 
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 Hu$tLa said:
Wouldnt agree wid 4,5,6

The 04 punisher went hard as fu*kfu*k
 usarmyboy83 said:
The Punisher in 2004 was good.


The 04 version was straight garbage, took me two sittings to sift through that hot mess. The whole family reunion massacre had me laughing, I couldn't take it seriously. How the fu*k do you manage to make such a serious, grim and dark character/comic so hokey and laughable?

I could rant about how bad this movie is all day long.

And the only good thing about War Zone was that he was finally a straight up k!ller and there was lots of gore in the movie, but regardless of that - both those recent versions were huge failures considering the source material.
 7 years ago '06        #15
titanreese 13 heat pts13
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I thought the 2004 Punisher was bad a.ss
 7 years ago '04        #16
KREW 25 heat pts25
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Daredevil is saved from that list because of the dope Director's Cut..
2004's Punisher was a good movie to me imo. It showed him as a happy dude turned bad-ass on a mission, what else was he supposed to be? Batman?..
Fantastic Four was a cool movie too. The sequel to it should be on this sh*t list tho. It was horrible.



The Punisher and FF need to be replaced by Batman & Robin and Elektra.
 7 years ago '10        #17
smokinthe420 4 heat pts
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Agree 4,5 and 6 is way better then any other movies on that list, should have been replaced...
 7 years ago '04        #18
Marccoogs19 180 heat pts180
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The Original Captain America movie.
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Conan makes fun of its crappiness every week.
 05-12-2011, 03:59 AM         #19
DOOMage 
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People need to open up the link, there are more on the list. Some of which people already mentioned.

Ang Lee's The Hulk is an honourable mention, another pile of hot garbage.

And I see what your saying about The Punisher in terms of his transformation of character, but it was not a good movie at all. What a waste of a good car that he spent so much time on only to get fu*ked up by that Spanish guitarist from those infomercials. Just one of the many awful instances in that film.

As to not stay on topic of just that sh*tpile, please tell me nobody on BX actually dug Wolverine? The only people I've come across that actually liked/loved it were women and that was strictly because of Jackman running around nekkid.


Last edited by DOOMage; 05-12-2011 at 04:03 AM..
 7 years ago '05        #20
C19932 1 heat pts
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i thought green hornet was pretty bad
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