The Official "Pineapple Express Quotes" Thread lol

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Props Slaps
 08-21-2008, 09:53 PM         #1
11189 pageviews

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The Official "Pineapple Express Quotes" Thread lol

aite so yea i saw the one for Tropic Thunder (funny movie, btw) and i decided to start one for dis movie:

"how the monkey did you get in here?!!!"

(ol boy offers other dude some weed) "No, I can't. My wife can always tell. She can smell it on my sweater."
(matheson) "You want my vest? It smell good."
(ol boy) "Its not my style."
(matheson) "You aint got no style, mothafu*ka"

"I look like the Hamburglar!"

"You just got k!lled by a Daewoo Lanos, motherfu*ker!"

"It's like if you took that Blue Oyster sh*t I gave you last week and then that crazy African Kush I had that one time--and they had a baby. And then, meanwhile, that crazy Northern Light sh*t I had and that Red sh*t I had made a baby. And by some crazy miracle, those two babies got together, and fu*ked--this would be it!"

(angie's dad) Are you high?!!!"
(dale) what? no!
(angie's mom) You are high as a fu*king kite!!!

(saul) the monkey's out of the bottle now!
(dale) What? That's not even...a figure of speech.
(saul) Pandora can't go back into the box--he only comes out.

(dale) Even if he found that roach, how could he find us?
(saul) ...heat seeking missiles...bloodhounds...foxes...barracudas...

(Saul) Alright man, let's go! I'm done with the woods!
(Dale) Oh, okay! Let's go. Oh wait. No. The battery's dead.
(Saul) Wait....................what do you mean the battery's dead?
(Dale).........I mean the battery is dead. The car needs a battery to start, Saul.
(Saul) No no..............What do you mean, the battery is dead?
(Dale) ..........How else can I explain this to you? The battery died. It has ceased to live.
(Saul) fu*k, man! We had on the fu*king talk radio all night. So boring! The car just committed suicide.

(Scientist) Private Miller, you've been smoking item nine for nine minutes. How do you feel?
(Private Miller) I feel like a slice of butter... melting over a big-ol' pile of flapjacks... yeah.

lmaooooo i can go on all day.....

7 comments for "The Official "Pineapple Express Quotes" Thread lol"

 08-21-2008, 11:01 PM         #2
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lmao...this movie is a classic period...fu*k the haters
 8 years ago '04        #3
jewelz1132 5 heat pts
avatar space
$11,023 | Props total: 453 453
:lachen001: Im bouts to watch this again
 8 years ago '06        #4
Bama Boy 83 heat pts83
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$52,835 | Props total: 1062 1062
Saul: fu*k The PO-LICE!

Angie: fu*k you, dale. i lost my virginity when i was like 14! how many women have you slept with?
Dale: like 2 & a half
Angie: 2 & a half? what is a half, your hand? that doesnt count!

Saul: fu*k Jeff Goldblum!

Saul: Whats down there? a fu*kin Rancor? (when they was takin him down the hole)

Saul: Enjoy ur last meal. (throws money at Dale) Here, supersize it, bi*ch!

Saul: Red! You came back! man, you lied to me. you said you had herpes and Dale said you didnt!
Red: i know man, im sorry, after seeing a guys nuts get smashed with my Daewoo, i love you man. i want to be inside you, holmes! lmao

Saul: its almost a shame to smoke it. its like k!lling a unicorn...with a bomb!

Saul: you're care committed suicide.

Fat Police bi*ch: i just saw a bunch of my kids come around the corner with their eyes as red as the devils d*ck!

Red: *pumps shotgun* THUG LIFE!

Saul: when my foot was in the hole, and my groin man, i felt like a wishbone.

Dale: it smells like gods v*gina

Saul: man, whyd we go the woods?
Dale: well you didnt come up with any ideas.
Saul: yea i did, i said nowhere & Quiznos.

Dale: if you're a d*ck ur whole life your gonna come back as something bad like a slug or a fu*king anal bead, man! but if u do something heoric then youll come back as something like an eagle or a dragon...or Jude Law! Now which would u rather be an anal bead or a dragon?
Red: i think....the anal bead....depending on who it belongs to.
Dale: it belongs to me.
Red: oh, well, then the dragon.

Robert: now you two do exactly what i tell you or ill fu*k you in the street.

Dale: *crying* i love you, i love you, i miss you, im sorry!
Angie: i know, i love you too. i wanna marry you!
Dale: oooooh, wow, im sorry. wow i made....a....mistake.

way too many to name em all tho
 8 years ago '08        #5
$2,445 | Props total: 3 3
Thuuuug Liffffe

Funny movie. Loved every minute of it.....well, not exactly. It slowed down towards the end.
 8 years ago '07        #6
TH35 86 heat pts86
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$74,612 | Props total: 5105 5105
Red: man i feel like that lil nerdy kid at the sleepover that falls asleep at like nine...

Red (bouncing the workout ball): I'm just up here, tryna' get a motherfu*kin' scholarship!

Dale: Is it really that rare?
Saul: It's, like, the rarest.
Saul: It's almost a shame to smoke it. It's like k!lling a unicorn...with, like, a bomb.

Bobby: Suck my balls. Two times!

Red:You see these? There's no hair under here, bro.
Dale Denton: What is the significance of that?
Red: It means I'm aerodynamic when I f!ght.

Dale (when talking to that teacher in the hallway): i dont go here so f*ck you ... you lil chimp muthaf*cka...

Matheson: I may act like a tough guy... but I have a lot of feelings inside. And you hurt almost all of them.

Last edited by TH35; 08-22-2008 at 12:30 AM..
 08-22-2008, 10:33 PM         #7
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Angie's Dad: Do as I say or I'll take you outside and fu*k you in the street!!

Ted: Say somethin in Spanish, go ahead, I dare you, go ahead.

Dale: I can't be addicted to marijuana, I use a bong, it filters out the addictive sh*t!

Angie: Why don't you ever act like you care about anything?
Dale: 'CAUSE I'M HIGH!!!

Saul: Why don't you super size it bi*ch.

Matheson: Ima k!ll the fu*k outta you!

Red: I can't do this. I got a wife man, she's gonna get outta jail soon, I wanna fu*k her, I wanna have s3x with her!

Matheson: Shut the fu*k up! Do you know what shut the fu*k up mean?
Dale: Yes, I do.

Dale: "Even if he found that roach, how could he find us?"
Saul: "Um...heat-seeking missiles...bloodhounds...and foxes...barracudas..."
Dale: "I'm just...I'm kind of flabbergasted when you say things like that. It's weird."

Matheson: I knew you were going soft. Dinner's gonna be cold tonight man.

Matheson: You need to sit your little s3xy down and watch yourself get k!lled.

movie was mad jokes
 8 years ago '07        #8
infamxus 12 heat pts12
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$5,392 | Props total: 2 2
[slowmo] fuuuuuucccck the pooooooliceeeeee [/slowmo]


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